좋다.

The more that time passes, as much as I try to push aside my feelings, it gets harder to deal with them. It's almost like there is a repulsive force repelling me from how I want to feel back to how I really feel inside. I don't know why I can't just place a guy in the friend zone and leave him where he is happy to be. It shouldn't be that hard.

It's not just me either. He totally confuses me. It's not that he's so sweet or even that he treats me any different than he does anyone else. I have become so comfortable around him, I love the deep conversations we have. I appreciate the fact that we have so many commonalities and interests. I like being around him. I like the fact that he knows what he likes, what he wants, and doesn't really care what anyone else thinks. It is so exciting to know someone who is so similar to me, yet so different. It's really attractive to me how he acts solely based on how he feels.

I hate to admit it, but apart from all the many reasons why I came this far, one of the reasons is him. I wanted to see if this would amount to anything. I hoped that when I came that I could recognize what these feelings really were, if it was just me or if it was mutual. The more that I stay here, the more I think that it was just me. This feeling of uneasiness won't go away...It's killing me.